Healing Tides Anxiety Release Meditation


Before I share with you my first ever recorded meditation, I'd like to teach you just how one goes about recording a meditation. It is, after all, a highly scientific process. But with these 15 steps, you’ll be recording like a boss in no time!  

1. Test microphone volume and wonder how anyone takes you seriously when you sound like a chipper wood nymph. 

2. Wonder why your “S” sound is so GD over pronounced.

3. Realize there is no way for you to correct “S” sound without sounding like a serial killer.

4. Play with cat who decides now is a good time to shuffle papers.

5. Resume recording now that cat is pacified.

6. Untangle cat from microphone cord. 

7. Record cat purring since untangling evidently feels like a kitty massage.

8. Wait for jet to pass. Hope there is no sonic boom just as you finally close in on that last paragraph.

9. Seriously contemplate hiring voice actor.

10. Wait for train to go by. Wonder if the Universe is conspiring against you.

11. Seriously? More jets?? 

12. Make a cup of matcha while waiting. Stare at sun. Contemplate meaning of life.

13. Decide the slow, soothing tones simply don’t work with your 
valley girl voice. Question purpose in life.

14. Embrace your weird-ass voice and go with a more natural cadence.

15. Turn on a heating pad to distract the cat. Give train number four in less than an hour an angry glare. Trade matcha for pumpkin bread. Hope readers won't share in your distain for elfin voice.


Considering my day started with not one but TWO dropped eggs on my kitchen floor (First my husband, then me. Something I've never done in my entire life!) I’m not surprised roughly 18 trains and 942 jets went by while trying to record. Throw in a naughty cat whose antics make me want to eat him alive due to overwhelming cuteness and you have one worn out blogger! 

Nonetheless, this Healing Tides Anxiety Release Meditation is a useful tool when anxiety becomes suffocating. And all in under 5 minutes! My crazy voice instructions mixed with the healing energies of the ocean tide are a healthy, natural way to slow your heart rate, quell your fears, and return your body to a state of tranquility! Grab yourself a copy by signing up for my monthly newsletter. 




Already a member? Check your inbox, because you have a link waiting for your listening pleasure!

Kick back, relax, and get ready for some wood-nypmhy meditations. Hope you enjoy! 


Do you use guided meditations? What topics would you like addressed in future meditations?

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NOTE: As with any recommendation found on this blog, consult your doctor or naturopath before use.